Heartilation - Andrew Jackson Jihad
Recently I've had my teeth drilled and filled with that metal stuff. Earlier today while eating a jawbreaker, much to my surprise, part of that tooth fell out, but, left the metal coating in place. Now I'm tempted to scratch at my tongue with the piece of protruding metal. It hurts like something's stuck there, which I guess technically there is.
Now for the real big issue that's going on in my life. I was invited to go bowling with NP and GD, I think I wrote that before. I did a stream of me painting the other night and I had a bunch of members from one of R's popular facebook groups, including S, much to my dismay, joining to watch me paint the Rake.
Amongst the attendees was GD, and, when the painting was finished, it just deformed into a video chat room where we talked about things such as Doctor Who and school and whatnot. I'm remembering exactly why I liked G now. She's funny, witty, intelligent, beautiful...
But, that's so wrong of me to feel when I love R more than anyone on this planet, isn't it? I don't want to exchange the two, but, my feelings for G are coming back up and it's a bit annoying. I like the both of them, but, I love R. That's the big difference here that I have to keep reminding myself. With G seemingly flirting, though, I'm questioning whether or not I'm making the right choice by waiting for R. I don't want to give R up, but, maybe she would be happier with someone else... Maybe we both would.
I'm going to give it time and thought, but, for now, even if the seed of doubt is sown, I won't allow it to blossom. R is my first priority, so, I'm going to have fun bowling with N and G, but, I'm not going to forget about my dearest R, or forget who was there for me when G was off with RL. God guide me in the right direction.
No comments:
Post a Comment