Quizzically titled blogpost

A spiritualist of common religious origin just visited my mother and I today. We talked for about half an hour.

It seems like he's a bit off with some of what he's saying, or, at least he's off with the timeframe. He picked up all of my depressive thoughts, but, they aren't with me anymore. I think I've just been cooked up in here for the last two years with all these feelings that all of my memories and emotions of the past are leaking out into him. He specifically told me extracting revenge on a certain someone who I never had to mention was a terrible idea and I should let God handle it. However, I haven't felt that way in two months, which leads me to wondering... Am I still the same inside? I feel so much different. I feel changed. I feel more faithful. I'm working on moving past this, but, he insisted upon the thought that suicide was not the answer, even though I haven't considered that seriously, since, what? February, March?

Either he is indeed picking up on old things or things are going to get worse in the future. I'm praying it's a future that's not set in stone. I wanna hang out with SK today. I haven't seen her in months, that irritates me, her summer classes for college are getting in the way of what I know would be an even more amazing friendship. She's the closest thing to a sister I've had in a long while, I guess it's just normal to miss her.

I think I'm going to send her the link to this blog soon. She went through a relationship similar to what I'm striving for with R, but, hers didn't end so well... I think the times have advanced from then, though. Voice and visuals are no longer a 'only during the actual meet-up' thing. I think my feelings for R are legitimate, not just something I've fabricated, which seems to be where SK and (I believe his name started with a) B's had gone sour. They discovered there was nothing romantic or intimate among them. I don't think I have anything to discover about my feelings towards R now. I'm about 90% sure this is real, else, I guess I'm just one of the best friends to ever exist, and, that's in no way a bad thing. Feels good, man.

In other news, the girl I had been going after in April, May, and June got back into contact with me. We're talking again as just friends and things seem to be working out good for everyone. It seems like a signal for the future that things are going to be better in the current situation than they would have been between us. Good.

Lord guide my words, my actions, and my intent.